Defining and appreciating my "village"

Most people have heard the following phrase: "It takes a village to raise a child." This expression is thought to have originated in Africa and attempts to convey the importance of providing a safe and healthy environment for children to grow up and thrive in.

The "villagers" in a child's life can be their parents, siblings, friends, school peers, religious leaders, or other community members. Each of these social connections can add richness into a child's life and provide a positive influence on the child. 

In my humble opinion, it also takes a village to send a child to law school. 

Receiving an acceptance letter to law school is the culmination of completing an undergraduate degree, studying and taking the LSAT, requesting letters of recommendation, writing personal statements, and submitting applications. Each of these steps require substantial time and energy, and can often lead students feeling emotionally drained. 

Michael Sandel notes in his book entitled The Tyranny of Merit that those who achieve success in a competitive meritocracy are "indebted in ways the competition obscures." In other words, our personal success can be attributed to other factors or people outside of our own doing and hard work. 

In an effort to shine light on those who have supported me on my journey to law school, I want to take a moment to highlight people who I would consider myself indebted to.

My Mom and Younger Brother: My Anchors

I could very easily spend an entire blog post dedicated to describing the support my family has given me. Suffice it to say, I owe so much (if not all) of my success to the love from my mother and little brother.

My mom has been a public school teacher for her entire career, has spent time teaching at the graduate level, and holds a Master's in Education. Her background led her to always push me and my brother to take advantage of education at every step in our lives. When I was accepted into an elite liberal arts college, she took on a second job teaching English to Chinese students via Zoom to help pay for my tuition.

Her sacrifice to help send me to college is one I think about every day. Without her support, I would have never been able to attend a top college and receive an amazing education. On top of it all, she has loved me through thick and thin; she is my biggest fan, my best friend, and the best person I know. She demonstrates to me what it means to work hard, never give up, and always be there for the ones you love. All of the traits I like about myself come from her and I always want to do my best so she is proud of me.

My brother has always served as a calming presence in my life. I admire his cool-headed demeanor and the positive perspective he can provide. He never fails to make me laugh and his kind, sensitive heart serves as my reminder to always stop and smell the roses.

It is difficult to find the right words to encompass all of the gratitude and love I have for them. All I can say is "thank-you" and I hope they know they are (and always will be) my biggest source of strength.

Friends: Past and Present

As those with great friends understand, there is nothing better than knowing you have a group of people cheering you on no matter what.

Prior to law school, my friends were nothing but supportive of my journey to becoming a lawyer. Although many of them were unfamiliar with the process or never attended an elite academic institution, that never stopped them from listening to me discuss what it would be like to be an attorney and encouraging me to chase my dreams.

My friends in law school have also been a steadying force. Law school breeds a competitive environment, but I have never once felt ashamed, belittled, or nervous to share any of my struggles. In fact, I always turn to them when I am facing a challenge I am not sure I can overcome because I know they will push me to do my best while also providing me with a safe space to share my feelings. Law school can be exiling at times, but I feel fortunate to have friends who never make me feel alone.

Extended Community: Mentors in the Legal Field

A common piece of advice many 1Ls receive upon entering law school is to find a mentor within the legal field. Mentors can provide students with their own lived experience as an attorney, act as a sounding board for the student, and give their advice on how to navigate challenging or confusing situations while in law school and beyond. But for First and Onlys, seeking a mentor can prove more difficult compared to students who enter law school with pre-established connections. 

I was fortunate enough to meet my mentor during the spring semester of 1L. One of the required courses first year law students must take at UC Davis is "Lawyering Process" and my mentor was the designated supervisor for our section. I connected with her because of her practical approach to her career and her passion for helping her clients.

When I was struggling to find a job last semester, we met at a coffee shop and she shared her story about job searching right out of law school. She reminded me to rely on my scrappiness and to stay resilient, just as she had done years ago. 

Job searching in law school tested my determination, but the support I received from my mentor reminded me that everyone faces setbacks at some point in their career. Her words of advice have continually stuck with me and constantly serve as a reminder that I can make it through tough situations as long as I stay committed. I will forever be thankful for her encouragement.

Gratitude and Appreciation

It is clear to me that my success and achievement is the product of all the love, support, and encouragement I have received from the "villagers" in my life. Without them, I would not be the woman I am today. I have so much gratitude and appreciation for those who have poured into me and I hope that I can make them proud as I continue down my path.