Being a first-generation student is my strength

I, like many of my classmates, am the first person to graduate from college in my family. Rather than pursue education, my parents, for various reasons, pursued a blue-collar job as law enforcement officers. They met each other at work, and the rest was history. Having two parents who were police officers meant graveyard shifts, staying quiet during the day so that dad could sleep before he went to work all night, celebrating holidays the next day because one or both parents didn’t have it off, and a paranoid mom & dad who worry about their children because they have seen too many tragedies. It also meant that both of my parents were leaders of their community, that I always felt safe, that they were assertive and street smart, and that they were great at talking to people. 

My older brother decided to pursue a career in law enforcement, just as my parents had. While I had considered going down that path, I always knew I wanted to go to college. My parents wanted that for me too. They always told me that I was too smart to be a police officer. It always bothered me when they would say that because it suggested that they were not smart enough, but my parents are the smartest people I know. I know, however, that while my parents were excellent at their job, they both wish they could have gone to college and done “more”.

I went to college at Sacramento State, just thirty minutes up the road from my childhood home, and despite being a clueless first-gen student, I felt right at home. I never experienced imposter syndrome and I was genuinely so excited to be there. The day before class, me and my mom went to the college and found out where all my classrooms would be so I wouldn’t be lost the first day. We were geeking out over the large lecture halls and the six-story library. 

I still remember my first day of college, in fact, I remember my first class. It was English 1 for freshmen. The professor wanted us to call her by her first name, Irena. I thought she was the coolest person I had ever met. She asked us questions as if she cared about our opinion. I had never had an authority figure care about what I had to say. I fell in love with college. 

What was interesting, and perhaps unique to Sacramento State and likely the CSU system, was that a substantial number of my peers were first-generation students as well. Thirty-four percent of students at Sac State are first-generation students. While we didn’t pause and reflect on that fact, there was an unspoken feeling of comfort and familiarity because most of us were local and knew of each other’s high schools, some of us had mutual friends and a lot of us shared similar backgrounds; lower to middle class kids, first in their family to go to college, and so incredibly excited to be there.

Four years of college went by too fast. I did well for myself, well enough to get into a tier one law school. As I sit here today, having graduated from college two and a half years ago and in my last year of law school, I reflect on how I got here. How I went from knowing close to nothing about higher education, to being months away from obtaining a juris doctorate. It seems surreal to me. Looking back at those first few weeks of college, I remember the excitement and novelty of it all. I realize that in large part, I have my first-generation status to thank for my success. 

Always, in the back of my mind, I was cognizant of the fact that I was achieving something that my parents wanted so much for themselves but never realized. I was doing it for them. My grandfather paid for my tuition, he was a military veteran and didn’t have a lot of money, but he valued education and wanted to help in this way, so he made it happen. I was doing it for him. My little brother was in high school when I went to college. He is brilliant and so much smarter than me. He looked up to me as a role model. I was doing it for him. I was told by my parents my whole life I could do “more”, that I was “too smart” and could achieve anything I put my mind to. I was doing it for myself. 

Research shows that when you are surrounded by people in your life who could not achieve higher education due to circumstances in their own life, it gives one perspective on the privilege that they must have to be granted such an opportunity. My peers and I at Sac State were so excited to be at college, because we understood not everyone gets the opportunity to do so; we made it, and we didn’t take that for granted for one second.